There are many children today who are so concerned about being beaten up or shot that they never have an opportunity to discover their own talents and abilities. They can’t go to school and concentrate on learning because they are worried about being the victims of violence. These children—in fact, all children—need to believe in themselves and to have a support system that includes God, family, friends, and community.

My childhood was not easy, but I did have that support system. I spent a great deal of time in church and Sunday school. I was an usher, choir member, and Boy Scout. The people in my church, my family, and my coaches were role models for me. They were caring people who helped shape my life. I believe it took a community to raise me, and that is why the community will always be a part of me and my life.

God and prayer were very critical in my life. They helped me withstand the trials and problems that came up. Prayer and a belief that there is something larger than I am are essential to my success.

Athletes were also my role models. It was important for me to be able to look up to athletes and aspire to be like them. I believe this is the reason I was able to stay out of trouble and to make good choices—choices based on a vision that showed me there was a process I would need to go through to achieve my goals. This kind of inspiration got me through college, allowed me to play basketball, and eventually got me into business.

Taking Personal Responsibility

About fourteen years ago, I started an organization called Athletes Against Drugs. It was a way to say “thank you” to the community of people who helped me discover that freedom is understanding who I am and recognizing all the possibilities that are there for me. I knew I had the power and opportunity to do anything I wanted to do—if I was willing to put the time and effort into doing it.

As an adult, I am doing what I love to do. Working with children, the people in my community, and athletes has enriched my understanding of freedom. Freedom is taking personal responsibility in making a life for ourselves. With this understanding, we quit blaming everyone else and everything else for whatever challenges us and we begin to shape our own lives. We then are able to identify our own talents and use them in our jobs, communities, and relationships.

I applied the concept of role models to Athletes Against Drugs, enrolling men and women as speakers who could inspire children and lead them in a direction that allows them to survive the growing-up years and become fulfilled adults.

A mother of a boy who was in our junior golf program told how her son became so hooked on golf after we gave him free golf lessons, that all he wanted to do was play golf. To continue to play, however, he had to keep up his grades. He was willing to do that, getting up early in the morning to practice at a golf driving range before he went to school.

His mother told me how thankful she was. The golf program had gotten him started on the right path by giving him six weeks of free golf lessons—lessons that she would not have been able to afford. In order to support him in his goal to become a professional golfer, she needed to know about the game, so she spent a lot of time watching golf on TV with her son. He was not only good at playing golf he was also good at teaching her about golf.

Will this young boy reach his goal of becoming a professional golfer? With a support system that includes God, his mother, organizations like Athletes Against Drugs, and his community, I think he will. I think all children who have the support of caring adults to help them believe in themselves and help them recognize every opportunity for achievement will succeed.

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In addition to his role as founder and executive director of Athletes Against Drugs, Stedman Graham is chief executive officer of Stedman Graham & Partners and chairman and chief executive officer of Stedman Graham Training & Development. Mr. Graham is an adjunct professor at the J. L. Kellogg Graduate School of Management at Northwestern University and is the author of the New York Times best-seller You Can Make It Happen: A Nine-Step Plan for Success.


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